I have shoe issues. Or rather recalcitrant ankle issues. High heels are forbidden me. It’s not like I ever wore high heels that much, but that’s not the point! I have been condemned to a life of boring, not-fun shoes in the hopes of preventing further ankle injury and thus averting surgery. I know, I know. It’s all too tedious for words. And makes shoe shopping a chore where I look at all the flats and low-heeled boots and my heart sinks. Gah! I hates them all.
Unfortunately, I cannot get about in sneakers, blunnies or kleenex boxes all the time on account of the increasing number of appearances and other formalish events I do. These require that I dress up in outfits that are not typically improved by said sneakers, blunnies and kleenex boxes.
The lovely Anne Ishii came to my rescue by telling me about her fabulous friend Meghan Cleary, the shoe goddess. Miss Meghan has written a book about shoes, The Perfect Fit, does appearances all over the US of A advising women about shoes as well as going on a million and one TV shows talking about the same. I defy you to find someone who knows more about shoes than Meghan.
On Friday Meghan took me shopping. She showed up in fabulous pale python cowboy boots (want!), jeans and a gorgeous deep green top that looked like she’d stolen it from a very hip elf (double want!). We liked each other instantly and started gas bagging, joshing, and generally having the best time in the world, gossiping happily about all the people we know in common, as well as those we don’t (poor Gwyneth and Tom—their ears musta been aburnin’).
Then she gave me a divine little show bag1 full of natty things that make your shoes more comfortable and stop them from giving you blisters. Today I put the insoles with gel shock absorbers into my years-old blunnies and they became even more comfie than they already were. It’s like magic. Why did no one tell me about comfie insoles before? Do you all want my feet to fall off?
Did you know that jewellery for shoes exists? They’re called shoe clips. I had no idea! Again, people, what’s with the holding out on me? Meghan had these gorgeous little diamante ones that she put on a pair of simple black pointy-toed flats and whooosh! they became a whole other pair of shoes. Admittedly, shoes that my sister would mock me for wearing, but I defy her! I can be girlie if I want to!
Check out the shoe clips at Aliza Dark. Her range pushes me very close to considering bows despite having alway hated them, but I suspect I will probably try one of the stone shoe clips first. I especially like the tiger’s eye. Absolutely Audrey also has a fabbie range. I am covetting quite a few of the antique clips.
Meghan took me into big department stores and walked around pulling shoes off shelves and describing them as she presented them to me. “Would you do lavender metallic pointy-toed ballet flats fit for a science fiction princess? Soft brown leather polo boots? How about these cute little mary-janes? No, I’ve changed my mind. Too mumsie.”
The vast majority of shoes I’ve owned in my life have been black or brown, but Meghan made me try on shoes I would never in a million years have considered if she weren’t there. Purply glittery shoes with tiny bows that looked almost exactly like Dorothy’s no-place-like-home shoes! And yet they looked really cute on and I almost bought them. Dark green alligator skin past-your-knees boots! Ditto. Maroon and black Manolo Blahniks! I swore I would never ever try a pair of Manolos on. Fortunately a) they were uncomfortable and b) they looked bad on me. Phew!
The shoe goddess showed me all sorts of divine shoes, but tragically too many times the salesperson would shake their heads and smile sadly. “I’m sorry. They’re all sold out.” Apparently if you are between size 7 and 10 and you do not go shoe shopping the first week the cool shoes appear, you’re doomed. They’re all gone. If you want winter shoes in NYC you have to hit the shops in July. If you want spring shoes you need to be there in December. You have been told.
I wound up with two pairs of the same simple-but-elegant flats. One in brown and one in black. Yes, I know that doesn’t exactly push me out into startlingly new-and-different shoe territory, but they didn’t have those ones in my size or price range, okay?
Besides, the immediate spoils are not the point. Meghan calls what she does with folks like me “shoe therapy” and my several hours with here were mucho therapeutic. She taught me way more about figuring out if a shoe is comfortable or not, how to customise them to make them even more comfie, and how to turn an ordinary daytime shoe into something sparkling and fabbie for the night, not to mention giving me the courage to be considerably more adventerous in my choice of shoes.
Thank you, shoe goddess!
NOTE: All shoe pictures were swiped from shoewama.com.
UPDATE: They were swiped to show a variety of flats, NOT because I think they are fabulous. Some of them are hideous in the extreme.