Archives
I am afraid that clowns will take over the world and make it compulsory for everyone to dress like a clown and wear that hideous make up. Yes, I have coulrophobia. I know this will never happen. But WHAT IF IT DID?!
I'm afraid of accidentally punching my boxing instructor. Cause she for sure would sock me back and then I'd finally have that black eye I have never had. Oh, wait, that's a real fear. Though I would kind of like a black eye. ((What? When I was little I thought black eyes were cool.))
I'm afraid of being alone on a desert island with only Moby Dick to read. Or even worse the complete works of Henry Miller. *shudder*
I'm ...
Posted by Justine at 6:44, September 7th, 2012 under Frippery, Ironical (This is Writ) |
I write this from my perspective as someone who has published nine books and received many critical reviews.
I know that's obvious but I think it needs restating up front. I know what I'm talking about. People have loathed each one of my books with the fire of a thousand burning suns. People have wanted to throw them across the room, to burn them, to make sure they never get into the hands of impressionable teenagers, to remove them from library bookshelves, and have been bored into a coma by them.
I used to be really upset by negative responses now not so much. I was even upset by what is now my all-time favourite punter review: "Like a bad ...
Posted by Justine at 16:33, August 29th, 2012 under Bloggery/Internetty Stuff, Ironical (This is Writ), Writing life |
We've all seen A Star is Born, right?
Aspiring actress meets established alcoholic actor whose career is on the downward turn. He helps her get her break. They fall in love and get married. She gets more famous as he gets drunker and less famous. She tries to help him unalcoholify. ((Yes, that's a real word. Oh, hush.)) He fears that he is holding her back and goes for swim in the Pacific Ocean. A very long swim.
Moral: there can only be one! No marriage can support two actors or two writers or two artists or two anything that can lead to fame. THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE FAMOUS ONE IN A RELATIONSHIP! Otherwise there will be long non-returning swims ...
Posted by Justine at 7:31, August 22nd, 2012 under Ironical (This is Writ), Ranting, Viewing, Writing goals & milestones, Writing life |
Sure, they came 3rd with 29 gold, 17 silver, 19 bronze and 65 overall. Given that they're the
22nd most populous country in the world they are clearly performing well above expectations. They are also the
22nd richest country. So, again, well done Great Britain!
However, let us not forget the incredible boost that the home country advantage gives you in the Olympics.
At the Sydney Olympics in 2000 Australia came 4th overall with 16 gold medals, 25 silver, 17 bronze, 58 in total.
For Great Britain to have surpassed Australia's efforts at our home olympics they needed to do three times as well as we did, given that they have three times our population. We are the 52nd most ...
Posted by Justine at 8:13, August 15th, 2012 under Ironical (This is Writ), Sport, State of the World |
Hmmm, I wonder if Holly Black would be interested in editing an anthology on that topic? It's almost as catchy as Zombies versus Unicorns. *cough*
@ronnidolorosa said that she'd "be really interested to read about your experiences in academia, and how it compares to being an author."
I was raised by two academics. Two lovely, smart, politically engaged and engaging, argumentative and enthusiastic academics. They both have PhDs. I kind of thought everyone got a PhD when they grew up. It's the main reason I have one. The majority of adults I knew when I was little were academics teaching and researching in universities around Australia and sometimes the world. I don't know when I first realised there were people in ...
Posted by Justine at 12:25, August 2nd, 2012 under Ironical (This is Writ), Publishing business, Writing life |
Since a few of you expressed mild interest in the speech I gave at
Sirens in October last year I thought I would share it with you. The theme was monsters and my speech involved me showing many monstrous images. Yes, that's my disclaimer, I wrote this to be spoken to a real life audience with funny pictures and the funny may not work so well without the kind and appreciative live audience. Or something. *cough*
Here it is:
Monsters I Have Loved
Ideas = Brain Monkeys According to Maureen Johnson
Like every other writer ever I get asked “where do you get your ideas” a lot. Today I thought instead of answering that question in the ...
Posted by Justine at 7:02, May 31st, 2012 under Cons & Other Gatherings, Fans & readers, Feminism, Ideas, Ironical (This is Writ), Listening, New York City/USA, Praising, Ranting, Reading, State of the World, Sydney/Australia, Travelling, Viewing, Writing life, Writing process |
. . . I finish a whole manuscript.
. . . I learn how to rewrite that whole manuscript.
. . . I get five/ten/fifteen/one hundred/etc rejection letters from real-life agents.
. . . I knuckle down and rewrite the book again. And again. And again. Etc.
. . . I get a request for the whole manuscript from a real-life agent.
. . . I get an agent.
. . . I get five rejections from publishers.
. . . I get ten rejections from publishers. (Would you believe twenty rejections? How about thirty? One hundred? One thousand? One million?)
. . . I start writing my second/third/fourth/fifth/etc book despite the fact that the first/second/third/fourth etc book hasn't sold yet.
. . . I get an offer from ...
Posted by Justine at 11:57, March 27th, 2012 under Frippery, Ironical (This is Writ), Publishing business, Writing goals & milestones, Writing life |
Because
Margo Lanagan is one of the best writers I know, and is wonderful in every way, and has written two of the best short story collections ever published (White Time and Black Juice)---I should probably follow her rules of writing to the letter.
But, see, she has this list of banned words and every one of those words sings to me:
accretion
amidst
amongst
atop*
corruscating
crepuscular*
effulgence
enervating
iridescent*
jasmine
maelstrom
obsidian* (Margo says, "only okay when used to describe arrowheads".)
pellucid*
roiling* (Margo says, "must be used with care".)
silken*
ululate*
whilst
There are heaps more but I can't remember the rest. Help me out, Margo? Margo's Clarion students?
Update: *Are Margo Lanagan additions to the list.
Ever since I heard of the existence of Margo's banned words list it has become my goal in life ...
Posted by Justine at 0:31, September 14th, 2006 under Frippery, Ironical (This is Writ), Magic or Madness trilogy, Words & Language, Writing process |
Posted by Justine at 21:33, September 23rd, 2005 under Bloggery/Internetty Stuff, Fans & readers, Ironical (This is Writ) |
In
Affectionate Remembrance
Of
AUSTRALIAN CRICKET WHICH DIED AT THE OVAL
On
12th September, 2005
Deeply lamented by a large circle of sorrowing friends and acquaintances
R. I. P.
N.B.---The body will be cremated and the ashes kept in England.
Posted by Justine at 11:33, September 12th, 2005 under Cricket, Ironical (This is Writ), Sport |
Posted by Justine at 12:25, August 23rd, 2005 under Bloggery/Internetty Stuff, Frippery, Ironical (This is Writ), Reading |
