(And I hate Moby Dick too, hooray! Having a published writer share my opinion makes me feel better.)

Thanks, Justine — I really needed this today

I have a friend who detests Jane Austen. Really detests — this is not mere indifference (which, really, who cares?) but dislike so active that whenever the topic comes up at all, he feels he must try to persuade me that I am WRONG. Which is v. odd, since he is otherwise, in general, both a kind and a clever person, and you would think we could just agree to disagree. I finally pinpointed the problem: whenever Ms Austen is being totally snarky and completely taking the piss, he thinks she is being serious. And you can see how, if one interpreted the books this way, one might indeed come away with a rather different impression from mine.

Also, it pleases me to know that though we will never see eye to eye on the vital issues of coffee and chocolate, we are in 100% agreement about Moby-Dick and Henry Miller.

I think my favorite thing in all of this is the alternate history version of Jane as a cowering American housewife, hiding her writing under embroidery. Just try to imagine how one might pull off that kind of concealment. I mean, really, try! Assuming she could even manage to set up a writing surface on her lap (difficult at best, I should think), the ensuing deceit would be ludicrous.

“Jane, I notice your needlework is rather blackened.”

“I assure you, dear husband, it’s the first stare of fashion. Everyone in Paris is decorating with ink these days.”

“And the papers?”

“Are, um, there to catch drips.”

“And the pens?”

“For… punching larger holes through particularly touch sections of linen…?”

“Riiiight.”

Well, I’m sorry to say I just can’t get into Pynchon. Even though everyone says he is a writer I would like. (And based on his subject matter and themes, yes, he is.) But I don’t care–I JUST CAN’T GET INTO HIM, OKAY?

But I love James Joyce and ULYSSES. Go figure.

Also, despite being an English major, I have never once read MOBY DICK. Never. I’ve read everything else by Melville, including his (somewhat decent) poetry. But I guess my professors assumed I had already the Great White Whale by the time I reached college. Never did. I read BENITO SERENO in high school instead.

Thanks Justine!

Great post, Justine.

It reminded me of a book review I wrote for Slashdot of “Online! The Book” back in 2003 (http://bit.ly/aQ4tQs). I rated it three out of ten (roughyl equivalent to a one star Amazon rating) and ripped it to shreds. A week afterwards I received an email from the author’s wife who said, in part, that she was ready to send me a rude email until she checked and discovered all my criticism was true. The most amusing thing, sales of the book went UP after my review.

Of course it didn’t compare to “Pride and Prejudice.”

// Tony