As far as how politicians or other types of people who meet large numbers of people on a regular basis do it, Robert Heinlein in his Double Star indicated one method: A Farley file (named for the politician who invented it). This basically means that as soon as it’s practical to do so, you write down as many salient features as possible of someone you just met. This is certainly a good memory aid, but in addition it provides a easy way to look up what your prior interactions with someone were when you expect to be meeting them again. Unfortunately not something average people would have the time, inclination, or steady use for.

I don’t, at least not any better than you do.

And I’ve met you once, at SFRA 2000 in Cleveland–I assume academic to academic. I don’t know whether I would recognize you now without a nametag, but you are the only person I remember from that conference, apart from the gentleman who somehow sustained a semi-serious groin injury (but I don’t remember his name or face, just the incident).

You I remember for the crossbow on your arm (because it was interesting), and the invitation to a LARP-like game because I (to my frustration) couldn’t go play. You said I “looked like a person who would enjoy” the game. Thanks, that’s a compliment; I am and was. Just FYI, I couldn’t play because my then-husband was having a snit about me being busy for four whole days in a row.

I don’t mind keeping the Phantom lyrics (occasionally useful at trivia), but I wish I could get rid of all the URLs stored in my brain. That’s why we have google!

lots of times, if I can’t remember who someone is, and can’t fake it, and it’s come to that point where i *have* to know their name, I’ll ask. i begin with an apology, “I’m so sorry, you know how it can be with names…” and if they give me a hard time about it, I ask them if they remember my middle name, and insist that I told them what it was the last time we met, and why don’t they remember it, huh, huh, huh?

i’ve heard that apple juice improves memory, and dehydration deteriorates it. don’t know if that is supposed to be long term or not. but i do know drinking apple juice clears my head if i’m spacey, so maybe it works?

~Mary

Also, as a general memory aid, I think name tags would be a great every day accessory! I love it at conferences and conventions when everyone has their name tags on and you can surreptitiously peek. And then at the evening parties, when the name tags come off, I still keep peeking at people’s chests in hopes of finding out who they are!!

another tip, after several recent times in which i’ve embarrassed myself by being on a search committee & failing to have recognized the interviewee’s name in advance as someone that i’ve already met: i am banned from ever using the phrase “good to meet you,” i am only ever saying “good to see you” because then i’m covered if i did indeed meet them previously!

This may not work for you, but I also try to find out something specific about people so I can file it away as “unusual” later. Like, labelling them “English James from Skye, looks like Harry Potter” in my brain. I try not to make it about their clothing though, since the next time we meet, they will likely be in different clothes. I also try not to associate them with movie stars or stuff like that, because it leads to embarrassing name mixups later. (For example, the realtor on our apartment looks like a ringer for Nathan Fillion–Mal, from Firefly–and I think his actual name is something like Eric, but in my head, I call him Nathan.)

It’s not surprising, though, is it? We’d met only once in the real world. Doesn’t matter how often you correspond if you meet rarely in real life you won’t have the instant face recognition going on.

Katerate: I genuinely think there’s something wrong with my brain. No one else in my family is anywhere near as bad as me. Maybe it’s inherited from some relative.

Rebecca: Don’t apologise. That’s an awesome skill! Hug it to your chest!

Ammy: You’re lucky. And, yeah, imdb is my friend also.

Lili: Hah!

don’t you wish you could clear out the bits of your brain that know all the lyrics to the phantom of the opera or something, and replace it with something useful?

Dunno. I kind of like all my Elvis trivia. I’d be sad not to remember what Elvis’ mother’s middle name was.

Chance: Good strategy.

yeah. it was my mum.

don’t you wish you could clear out the bits of your brain that know all the lyrics to the phantom of the opera or something, and replace it with something useful?

Sometimes I’m known to forget a face when I’m not paying attention during introductions, but other than that, I work well with names and faces.

Even so, if I’m watching a movie and I just KNOW that I’ve seen an actor before, imdb is my best friend in most cases.

It’s not like we’re too lazy to remember, right?! We just can’t.

Is there anyone else in your family like that, Justine? Like your father or mother? I think I inherited this trait from my father’s side; he mixes me and my sister up all the time (as do his brothers with their kids). Maybe it’s genetic?

For example, I’ve met E. Lockhart many times. I adore her. I know her. We’re friends, for chrissakes. And she came up to me at some breakfast, and it took me a minute to understand who she was.

Or like I went back to my “old store” — where I worked a mere TWO WEEKS AGO — and I couldn’t remember several of the part-time employee’s names anymore. I feel like there’s just some kind of glitch in my brain for that.

Because of that, I sort of expect that people won’t remember my name, so I try and make sure that (if I’m at an event or something) my nametag is very visible. And I hope that theirs is, too.

(BTW, the only way I recognized you at that dinner thing is because I heard you give your name to the lady. Otherwise you might have just walked on by me without my batting an eye. No offense, I definitely know who you are!!)